hope for the N time

i type in "hope" at the search bar of edit posts. and there were more than 50 posts that i used the word "hope"

i don't remember if i said this before, and i usually forget what i've written. even it's yesterday's post. @.@

anyway, hope... it's something that drive each and every one of us forward. hope is something we cling on to when despair is all we could feel. hope it's just a way of saying, i'll try... when sometimes trying is just not enough. 'hope' is a faint prayer that just dies of once we open our eyes and unclutched our hands. they say faith is all we need, but where is faith, and how do you define faith?

Lord Jesus?

Allah?

Buddha?

or Myself?

i'm not a strong believer in religion. neither do i reject any of them that could possibly shed light when i'm searching for answers. i've step into temples and churches. seek for answers in front of the 'cross' and 'statues'. and so far, none gave me the answers that i'm seeking. some say, you need to study it before you form your judgement. others just ask you to believe god is in everyone of us. funny, i tend to buy the latter's idea.

when we hope and pray for something, usually we hope that it will go well for us, and probably move on to others. wishing them well. it's nothing less noble that we pray and hope for the best of well-being of others. just that... we are selfish. and nothing wrong. we tend to protect our welfare first, and others second. even it's unconditional love. i might be just opening another can of worms. you see, by providing love and care towards the others, your heart tend to be at ease, align with your own belief. you are calming yourself by putting others in priority. you feel good after doing so. it's actually a double-edge sword.

coming back to the idea of hope, we tend to get disappointed every time when we put every ounce of energy hoping for the best. in the end, we rationalize things happened for a reason, and it could be the betterment for us. there are things we could learn from. trying all to act positive and being optimistic about the situation that smack right in front of your face; with 'you're in deep shit' sign looming.

all i'm saying... some times it's tiring to hope. things that don't go your way, it's frustrates you to the max. the irony part is we all hope for the better. question is, are we doing anything to improve the situation, and climb out the rabbit hole.