one of the rare moments, where i couldn't sleep again. come to think again, not rare at all. just that i probably be rolling, twisting and turning on my bed.
been having quite a few dreams lately. what's even more amusing, had a few in a night. different dreams, sometimes is in sequential, sometimes in a series, sometimes just random giler.
had one, couple of days ago. i dreamt of a friend of mine who's living in the States. haven't seen her since my days back in A-levels.
funny thing is we met in this city, HK? KL? i don't know, just somewhere in this corner of the earth. anyway, she was with her bf, and somehow or rather i know her bf. weirid thing is, i talked to her bf, but not her. she was like totally ignoring me. on the other hand, i felt that she was waiting for me to say hi, but i didn't have the... urge? courage? to utter the two letter, that forms d word... H.I.
finally, when i manage to pull every energy in my body and my b*lls align. she and her bf where at least a block away. i chase, by the time i reach and shouted their names, they were long gone boarding the bus.
reflecting back a lil. when you met/bumped into someone you haven't seen for ages. you either go bizzare, shouting and screaming in the middle of the street, all so excited. and some passerby just gives you the weird stare. OR... you just say hi...how life...? (notice i've cut short the sentence? on top of that, you ask how's life, instead of asking bout their well-being)
for some strange reasons, you and your friend just aren't able to click anymore. those days, the time you spend with each other is more than you sleep. you were so close that a twitch of eye-brow, you know what the other is thinking. but then.. for some unavoided circumstances, you need to go your seperate ways.
as they say, the world is small.. very small. indeed it is. turn and fly wherever you may be, but for some peculliar reasons, we may just bumped into each other in 101th street in New York city. (assuming you're both from 'tanah yang amat tercinta anda' aka malaysia)
and this shows... =)
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
9 years
why has it always got to be this way.
i think i deserve to be treated better.
when you claim that i'm your best friend. bullshit..
not even close.
we can't even have a normal conversation.
it's always 'how are you?, do you know this?, do you know that?'
crap...
you got the initiative to ask, but never have the time to execute it.
what's the point.
might as well don't ask at all, right?
best of all, i'm never in your plans.
so, why give a damn about asking at the very first place.
or maybe i'm the one who is not making the effort at all.
or maybe i'm just not worthy of your time to come out for a drink.
or maybe... i just don't care anymore.
9 years...
no point blaming. fact is, we no longer are in the same wave length. period.
i think i deserve to be treated better.
when you claim that i'm your best friend. bullshit..
not even close.
we can't even have a normal conversation.
it's always 'how are you?, do you know this?, do you know that?'
crap...
you got the initiative to ask, but never have the time to execute it.
what's the point.
might as well don't ask at all, right?
best of all, i'm never in your plans.
so, why give a damn about asking at the very first place.
or maybe i'm the one who is not making the effort at all.
or maybe i'm just not worthy of your time to come out for a drink.
or maybe... i just don't care anymore.
9 years...
no point blaming. fact is, we no longer are in the same wave length. period.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
last name
suppose to post this weeks ago, when i had this conversation with a friend.
you know we all have names. like duh. we've been given one since we were born. some were given when the mom found out the pregnancy test tube indicated positive.
names are important, it represents who we are and where we come from ( in certain culture) not saying that your last name is Smith, means that your a blackSmith. in a way, it is something that is peg on us for the rest of our life.
imagine walking down the street, and you saw your friend up ahead, you shouted 'hey!' and hundreds pairs of eyes turn to you responding... 'you call me?' although in reality, people do turn to look at you when you shout 'hey' along the busy street.
moreover, with a name, especially a last name. you could well trace back your roots. where you from, what great things your ancestor achieve. in the movie, DaVinci code; the actress found that that she is the last survivor of Jesus bloodline. how cool was that.
even if you manage to trace back and found out that your ancestors are the a bunch of killers or buglers. but hey.. you should be proud, as you manage to trace back, unlike many others who can't.
crap.. this is not suppose to turn out this way...
as i was saying, (or initially plan to write). names are essential to every. it could very well identify you as a person, not your characters or personalities, but merely a name calling. hence, think carefully if you have a child next time. make it sound nice, or grand. the very minimum, don't disgrace your own family name.
i got a friend, the surname is Ma. and plans to name his kids.
if is a daugther.... Ma Qiu Fan
if is a son... Ma Guai Fan
how cool is that?!?!
mike plans to name his sons and daughter this way.
Version Wan
Episode Wan
Season Wan
yeng!!
as for me...
Saw Ur *toot*
Saw That? (yes.. with a question mark)
if anyone of you say the 'H' word after my surname in my cbox or comment. you can all go bang the wall.
to those who don't have cool surnames. it's ok. it's not end of the world. maybe next life. just hope that you'll not born in some creepy and weird family.
cheers~~
you know we all have names. like duh. we've been given one since we were born. some were given when the mom found out the pregnancy test tube indicated positive.
names are important, it represents who we are and where we come from ( in certain culture) not saying that your last name is Smith, means that your a blackSmith. in a way, it is something that is peg on us for the rest of our life.
imagine walking down the street, and you saw your friend up ahead, you shouted 'hey!' and hundreds pairs of eyes turn to you responding... 'you call me?' although in reality, people do turn to look at you when you shout 'hey' along the busy street.
moreover, with a name, especially a last name. you could well trace back your roots. where you from, what great things your ancestor achieve. in the movie, DaVinci code; the actress found that that she is the last survivor of Jesus bloodline. how cool was that.
even if you manage to trace back and found out that your ancestors are the a bunch of killers or buglers. but hey.. you should be proud, as you manage to trace back, unlike many others who can't.
crap.. this is not suppose to turn out this way...
as i was saying, (or initially plan to write). names are essential to every. it could very well identify you as a person, not your characters or personalities, but merely a name calling. hence, think carefully if you have a child next time. make it sound nice, or grand. the very minimum, don't disgrace your own family name.
i got a friend, the surname is Ma. and plans to name his kids.
if is a daugther.... Ma Qiu Fan
if is a son... Ma Guai Fan
how cool is that?!?!
mike plans to name his sons and daughter this way.
Version Wan
Episode Wan
Season Wan
yeng!!
as for me...
Saw Ur *toot*
Saw That? (yes.. with a question mark)
if anyone of you say the 'H' word after my surname in my cbox or comment. you can all go bang the wall.
to those who don't have cool surnames. it's ok. it's not end of the world. maybe next life. just hope that you'll not born in some creepy and weird family.
cheers~~
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
pinball
sometimes life is like a pinball.
it tosses you around with the invincible hands controlling.
Monday, January 05, 2009
'package'
considered my proposal??
the package proposal?
yaya... 288, 388, 488.... 888!!
hm.. let me think...
come on.. i know u want it *grin*
k loo... bit tight this month.. 488 will do.
hooray!!
if u have no idea what i just talk bout.. it's an inside joke.
Thursday, January 01, 2009
stepping into 09
2008... passed by just like that.
most of us will be asking, 'have i accomplish what i've set at the beginning of the year? have my resolutions been met? have i gone richer/wiser/taller/rounder/more stable/....?'
well, a year ago.. i didn't set any resolution. so, i can't say i achieved something i have not set fort. otherwise, it will be plain weird. yet.. i've learned so many things that i never imagine i would be in the previous 20 odd years of my life.
still sticking to the quote of 'things happen for a reason, and for whateva reason it may be, it is for the better who goes through it'
the break up was probably d best thing that ever happened. in theory, i needed that. although the process was not pleasant. yet, i can't say i enjoy it nor disgust bout it. anyway, the experience was... different.
apart from that, being in a circle of friends who constantly encourage, irritate, push, smack you... actually helps. encourage when your down, irritate when you middle of something important, push you when the going gets tough, smack you when you got out of line.
going places with other lifeless human beings make life not so lifeless. thou it was just short trips to islands, beaches, and towns. some were quite far. come to think of it, i traveled the most compare with previous years. for the sake of not forgetting, not showing off. i've been to Penang, Ipoh, P.Dickson, Malacca (9 times), J.B., Kuantan, Tioman, Pangkor, Singapore, Batam, Bangkok. some locations were work purpose, and others were for leisure. i don't fly first class, stay in 5-stars hotel. to me, the important things are the food, culture and company that were travelling with you.
i felt different compare with previous year. if you ask me how different, i can't tell you. cuz i dont' know how to tell you, and i don't know what causes it. they say people don't change. this theory is true till a certain extend. to me, i felt different, it seems the same on the surface, but i know something inside me have change. so, do people really change? *shrugged shoulders*
academic wise... i think i did okayy. a lil hardworking compare to year 1 of this course. put in more effort compare with pervious years of no effort. ha ha... nth much to talk bout this area. thou i learned many things. mostly are psych terms, which probably will bored those people who are unrelated in this field. (but if you're still interested, read back some of post thru out 08)
i begin to like my smile more and more. (random giler)
resolution... how can 1 not talk bout resolution. well... i got nothing to say bout this. become a better person than yr 08? make more money? grow wiser? so cliche. anyway, see how it goes. journey and experience are more important than d goal itself. will see.
most of us will be asking, 'have i accomplish what i've set at the beginning of the year? have my resolutions been met? have i gone richer/wiser/taller/rounder/more stable/....?'
well, a year ago.. i didn't set any resolution. so, i can't say i achieved something i have not set fort. otherwise, it will be plain weird. yet.. i've learned so many things that i never imagine i would be in the previous 20 odd years of my life.
still sticking to the quote of 'things happen for a reason, and for whateva reason it may be, it is for the better who goes through it'
the break up was probably d best thing that ever happened. in theory, i needed that. although the process was not pleasant. yet, i can't say i enjoy it nor disgust bout it. anyway, the experience was... different.
apart from that, being in a circle of friends who constantly encourage, irritate, push, smack you... actually helps. encourage when your down, irritate when you middle of something important, push you when the going gets tough, smack you when you got out of line.
going places with other lifeless human beings make life not so lifeless. thou it was just short trips to islands, beaches, and towns. some were quite far. come to think of it, i traveled the most compare with previous years. for the sake of not forgetting, not showing off. i've been to Penang, Ipoh, P.Dickson, Malacca (9 times), J.B., Kuantan, Tioman, Pangkor, Singapore, Batam, Bangkok. some locations were work purpose, and others were for leisure. i don't fly first class, stay in 5-stars hotel. to me, the important things are the food, culture and company that were travelling with you.
i felt different compare with previous year. if you ask me how different, i can't tell you. cuz i dont' know how to tell you, and i don't know what causes it. they say people don't change. this theory is true till a certain extend. to me, i felt different, it seems the same on the surface, but i know something inside me have change. so, do people really change? *shrugged shoulders*
academic wise... i think i did okayy. a lil hardworking compare to year 1 of this course. put in more effort compare with pervious years of no effort. ha ha... nth much to talk bout this area. thou i learned many things. mostly are psych terms, which probably will bored those people who are unrelated in this field. (but if you're still interested, read back some of post thru out 08)
i begin to like my smile more and more. (random giler)
resolution... how can 1 not talk bout resolution. well... i got nothing to say bout this. become a better person than yr 08? make more money? grow wiser? so cliche. anyway, see how it goes. journey and experience are more important than d goal itself. will see.
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